- Shashikala Dasi (Siksa Disciple, Vrndavana)
He Pacified My Distressed Mind And Brought Solace Into My Soul
JAYA SRI GURU GAURANGA!
Most worshipable Srila Maharaji my dear Uncleji,
Please accept my very affectionate and most grateful obeisances at your lotus feet. Remembering You always brings tears and moves my heart so deeply.
In Absolute honesty, You would not have appeared on this earth, my life would have been so so much more miserable after my Most worshipable Srila Gurudeva 's physical disappearance from our vision.
I was left with nothing but a broken heart having lost my very life and soul, as my entire life was solely depending on Him my Divine Master..
You were so close to his heart, so that you could understand mine as well.
How you left without reservation to Puri ( Even Though you had a reserved ticket for the next day ) to vacate your own room to offer it to my Gurudeva. This sacrifice of your so special Vaisnava seva brought You close to me, as the Only spiritual Uncleji, I could Really Trust having that much affection and regards for my own Sri Guru.
By the causeless mercy of Vaisnavas I have heard of your tremendous Guru nishtha and most excellent and expert Guru Seva. Your knowledge of sastras was so gigantic, we could just dive deep and be drowned like in an ocean.
Honestly it was far beyond my capacity having a bird's brain, noneless you tolerated so sweetly my infinite lacking in so many fields. You had accepted me just the way I was and were there for me anytime I was feeling lost and desperate trying to hold unto life itself.
You pacified my distressed mind and brought solace into my soul, I knew you truly cared for this fallen soul and just wished to so selflessly help, and re-comfort this orphan I had so unfortunately become..
You were my only true friend in this striving for existence. Never before I had experienced deepest and grievous loss in my life, I have no words to express any of my gratitude which so unfortunately can never reach an acceptable level for the time and affection You have offered me, knowing very well, how I was completely unable to reciprocate with your divine kindness and compassion.
Your Most Auspicious Appearance on Sayana Ekadasi makes us feels that you can offer an eternal rest for the over wandering exhausted lost jivas, who by extraordinary good fortunate could reach your lotus feet and receive your, so loving merciful glance and Mahaprasadam from your tireless lotus hand.
Please forgive my countless faults and please never stop backing me up in my attempt to reach my Srila Gurudeva's lotus feet in Sri Vraja Vrindavan Dham where all of you now are immersed in the divine nitya seva of Srimati Radharani under the ecstatic guidance of Srimati Rupa and Rati Manjari.
I will always remember you as my very affectionate well-wisher and I pray that you may never forget to bestow some drop of mercy upon this fallen and undersing aspiring servant of Sri Guru and Vaisnavas.
From core of my heart, THANK YOU dear Uncleji.
Radhe Radhe !
so tiny and lowest,